I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Randomize