I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Randomize
