Do you still have your period?
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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