Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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