I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize