"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
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