I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
And then he peed in my hair
Randomize
