She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Randomize
