The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
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