Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
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