So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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