guys are only as good as the porn they watch
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
