Dual....:-)
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
Randomize
