i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Never underestimate the power of titties
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