I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
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