He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
