Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I was high as a kite when I got pulled over by a cop and he asked me for my ID and if I had been smoking weed, I said no and gave him my debit card.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
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