I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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