"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
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