Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Randomize
