Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
operation have a gay friend backfired
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
