Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
