I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
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wow
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
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