He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
i out mim tonsoeep
Randomize
