the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Randomize
