pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
17 year olds will be the death of me.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
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