Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
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