I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
His hands were made for my vagina.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Randomize
