This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize
