i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
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