You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize
