He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
I didn't notice because vodka
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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