I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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