She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
