why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
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