I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize