There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize