this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Randomize
