My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
