Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
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