Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Randomize
