I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
If I had your ass I would rule the world
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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