i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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