ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
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