i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
do herpes really smell.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
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