Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
Randomize
