Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
you're hired as official boob wrangler
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize