you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize
