I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Little spoons don't ask big questions
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
Randomize
