i was born a porn star she said
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Randomize
