what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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