She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
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